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Villanelle To A Sperm Donor
Kowboy
Creative Writing class this semester and I've got a villanelle due on Wednesday morning. I'm a villanelle virgin, but please don't be gentle:

Your bio donation compensated by fee
Turkey baster, timing, conception wrought
Pay for what Iíve done so often for free

My nephewís birth has brought great joy to me
As anxious lesbian mothers are fraught
Your bio donation compensated by fee

Perfectly recessive genes have to be
Aunt Lynnís crooked fingers perfectly caught
Pay for what Iíve done so often for free

His smile an explosion, big as a tree
Your genetic fight has not been for naught
Your bio donation compensated by fee

Heís five now and swordfights fill me with glee
Hot Wheels and snow fights all being taught
Pay for what Iíve done so often for free

Lives changed with your generosity
Ironically a joy that canít be bought
Your bio donation compensated by fee
Pay for what Iíve done so often for free
 
Skeeve
Gonna have to Google

Google Search villanelle
 
Theory_Execution
Hmmmmm,

1a
2b
3a

4a
5b
1a

6a
7b
3a

8a
9b
1a

10a
11b
3a

12c
13b
1a
3a

Nope, means nothing to me that.
 
Bob of QF
The letters represent the rhyming sequence, but say nothing about the length of each phrase (may not matter for a villanelle)

I.e. for a Hiku, you don't have to rhyme at all, but you must use 5 syllables, then 7, then 5 again in a common theme.

In any case, the first set must contain 3 lines, rhyming at the end with the first and last lines, the middle is something else: 1a 2b 3a

The next set of 3 lines, repeats the same pattern as the first set: 4a 5b 1a, and so on.

But it appears a tad more complex than that, with the repetition of the "1a" for line 6, so...

Wiki says:

The villanelle has no established meter, although most 19th-century villanelles have used trimeter or tetrameter and most 20th-century villanelles have used pentameter. The essence of the fixed modern form is its distinctive pattern of rhyme and repetition. The rhyme-and-refrain pattern of the villanelle can be schematized as A1bA2 abA1 abA2 abA1 abA2 abA1A2 where letters ("a" and "b"Wink indicate the two rhyme sounds, upper case indicates a refrain ("A"Wink, and superscript numerals (1 and 2) indicate Refrain 1 and Refrain 2.


Okay, they want a total-line repeat, not just the ending rhyme.

Hmmm.... I shoulda read the main-sequence entry in Wiki first.... it's actually meant to be sung, which explains well, it's repetitive nature.

A villanelle is a poetic form which entered English-language poetry in the 19th century from the imitation of French models.[1] The word derives from the Italian villanella from Latin villanus (rustic).[2] A villanelle has only two rhyme sounds. The first and third lines of the first stanza are rhyming refrains that alternate as the third line in each successive stanza and form a couplet at the close. A villanelle is nineteen lines long, consisting of five tercets and one concluding quatrain.[3] In music, it is a dance form, accompanied by sung lyrics or an instrumental piece based on this dance form.[


---------------

I'm not a fan of poetry, but I do enjoy analysis...

Wink
Quantum Junction: Use both lanes

Reality is that which is left, after you stop believing.
 
Bob of QF
Kowboy:

Not bad-- you fit the rules, as near as I can tell.

And you managed to tell a little story while doing it, as all good ballads should.

I presume you are not required to create music, too? Pfft Grin

Your rhythm would work with song, if you needed it to.

I'd say, not bad-- but then I'm hardly a jaded expert, when it comes to poetry. But, because I'm acquainted with you as a person? I'm positively biased in your favor-- I tend to be that way. I appreciate amateur effort, regardless.
Edited by Bob of QF on 01/25/2011 14:06
Quantum Junction: Use both lanes

Reality is that which is left, after you stop believing.
 
Kowboy
Bob of QF:

Thanks. Here's the final version of my Villanelle and Pantoum:



Villanelle To A Sperm Donor

Bio donation compensated by fee
turkey baster, timing, conception wrought.
Payment for what I do often for free.

My nephewís birth has brought great joy to me
while anxious lesbian mother is fraught.
Bio donation compensated by fee.

Thankfully recessive genes are to be;
Aunt Lynnís crooked fingers perfectly caught.
Payment for what I do often for free.

His smile an explosion, big as a tree
your genetic fight has not been for naught.
Bio donation compensated by fee.

Heís five now and swordfights fill me with glee
ďthe clawĒ, chasing, teasing and tickling taught.
Payment for what I do so often for free.

Lives changed by your generosity,
ironically a joy that canít be bought.
Bio donation compensated by fee.
Payment for what I do so often for free.


If Only I Were Smarter

If only I were smarter
school would be a breeze.
Would mathematicians barter
for some literature please?

School would be a breeze
I could satiate my fix.
For some literature please
a harmless verbose kick

I could satiate my fix
brain transplants arenít done yet.
A harmless verbose kick
Iíd be in a surgeonís debt.

Brain transplants arenít done yet
I will not give up hope
Iíd be in a surgeonís debt.
I think that Iíll just mope

Longer study does no good.
Would mathematicians barter?
Iíd be happier if I could
If only I were smarter.


http://en.wikiped...Villanelle

http://www.baymoo...antoum.htm
 
Doubting Thomas
Here's a haiku I came up with: 6, 9, empty box, empty box, empty box, 3, empty box, 1, empty box.
Next line, 2, empty box, empty box, 4, 8...

Oh wait, did I say haiku? I meant sodoku.
You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me and not you.
 
Kowboy
Sonnet Of The Middle Aged Man

Why doth mine hair groweth out mine nose, pray tell?
Brows grown thickly as the virgin forest.
Mine youth saw the cast of no such evil spell;
Ears, nose and brows burst as angry chorus,
Yield to the skills and tools of mine paid wench;
Who leaves not a recurrant shaft untrimmed.
May let them grow, as often do the French
But wife would have the light of marriage dimmed.
What incantation to invoke to spring;
Head hair on top and rear lying fallow.
Now middle age forlornly taketh wing;
As more needless growth awaits the morrow.
Mirrored, as tweezers yank I wince in pain;
Heavy the price one pays for being vain.
 
Bob of QF
I like it, Kowboy.

But what is not generally known about hair, during middle and old age?

It is not so much that it's vanishing, is that it's migrating south.

Smile
Quantum Junction: Use both lanes

Reality is that which is left, after you stop believing.
 
Kowboy
Bob of QF wrote:
I like it, Kowboy.

But what is not generally known about hair, during middle and old age?

It is not so much that it's vanishing, is that it's migrating south.

Smile


Bob of QF:

My hair is starting to wave. Goodbye.

Revision:

Why doth hair groweth out mine nose, pray tell?
Brows grow thickly as the virgin forest.
Mine youth neíer saw the cast such evil spell;
Ears, nose and brows burst in angry chorus,
Yield to the skills and tools of mine paid wench;
She leaves not a recurrant shaft untrimmed.
May let them grow, as often do the French
But wife would have the light of marriage dimmed.
What incantation to invoke to spring;
Top and rear head hair oerísnowed and fallow.
Now middle age forlornly taketh wing;
As more needless growth awaits the morrow.
Mirrored, as tweezers yank I wince in pain;
Enough dear-bought the tribute to the vain.
 
seeker
Kowboy wrote:
My hair is starting to wave. Goodbye.


Be a glass half full guy, you aren't losing hair, you are getting more head.
"Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it." - George Santayana
 
Skeeve
I blame all of you for encouraging kowboy. Cool
"The world is my country, and do good is my religion." - Thomas Paine
 
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